November 25, 2019
Nov. 25 I miss very tired. I adore miss you so much! I ache to hold so much! I ache to hold you in my arms. Did not sleep well last night. You were night. You're always there I must say.. My mindy mind the whole The first thing in the morning, and the last thing at night. What I desire is
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Don't to wake up next to you. That is what I call heaven to do today. Maybe sleep ?!?. Went know what I'm going Then I had for a long walk this morning a lot to catch up on from last week.
Yoga. Have
I know this problem is so fixable. I'll do anything to fix it my darling. You and us are worth it. We've let this go on far far too long I have a regret that I did not call you on. I just desire to talk July to you. 3 and say.
- let's talk. Right now, This has got so far out of
hand and I'm sorry, but unless you can convince me otherwise, Erin has gotten too involved and has manipulated the situation too much. I know that may infuriate you.
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If we can fix this there are three conditions:
O If you get angry with me.... talk to me. Don't run, hide or ignore me or the situation
Take as much time as you need. Just talk to me Amanda Ruth Verhoeven, you are the
Great life. I want to spend my life with you. I want the first thing I see every day and be m
Each day my love of my れな you to be last thought
I want to sleep next to the blast fumace that you describe yourself yourself as. I want your face to be the last thing see in this life or the first thing I see in the next life I want to marry you! I want our want our funny farm funny farm. I want the large family we dreamed about. I think you are absolutely perfect- no matter what and I love you no matter what- unconditionally and for ever and when for ever ends, I will
still love
love you
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(Ahhh, more blame Erin, instead of taking responsibility of his own actions. Classic narcissist move. They always try to isolate you from your friends, family and support groups. They are more powerful when you have no one to turn to.)
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Amanda-
you
back
are the great love of my life. I feel bad about the night we got interrupted and when you said in an email that it was a "red flag" - I felt gutted. If I could go intime and change things I would and I would finish what night. The fundamental thing I wanted to is that that in my life
say you are the great love of my life. Why? I don't know but I have thought about it a lot over the past few let me tell you. months and if I tried to record all the reasons why I think all the books (like this) in the world would not be able to contain heart. my reasons. It is etched deep in my soul and in my I don't know how else to tell you this trith.
The more you push me away the more I fall in love. When I I mean it. I can't imagine my life without I adore you you. I always said- you are non-negotiable my promise to never let go will always be there. It is what I would term a Credo.
I would you going to I had a lot of time to think last week. I'm try and put many of my thoughts down in this book as I don't want to forget them. I want to know them. Right now give everything to gaze on eyes! your wonderful smile! I a your face. Your amazing your voice! to hear your I really adore how you say, "Hello!" I want you to know I'm not mad at you. I will admit I am mad about you, I have been since I first saw you. I knew you were the one Do you remember the night you asked me, "Where have entire life?" I do. That was because I was amazing thinking the same thing. You already had me, but that was what sealed the whole thing. My ve you been you
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divorce because I have done so much for you. I finalized my of you. I applied for an annulment because of you.Jam becoming always Roman Catholic because of you. wanted to but you sealed that for me I know my thoughts are all over the place, but there wont is one unifying thing and that is you. One of the things I thought about is what would we do if we can fix this. First I want you to know it is fixable. I have two options. I would love to just resume where we left off. Option # 1 is to move in together. I really want that. My offer of $look is still valid. I would be really happy to help pay off your mortgage. No questions or obligation to pay me back. If we did that I would be happy. I would also propose we make a promise to each other and seal it with "promise rings" which would later become wedding rings. I must confers I have already looked around for rings. ( Your engagement ring and a wedding band are already in the bank safety deposit box- they are yours!) just so you know I am faithfully wearing a rose gold band and it symbolizes my loyalty and faithfulness to you-my darling Ladybird
The second option is to get married quickly. As of next Monday, I am free to do that. If your divorce were final we could get married at City Hall if that would work. It would be intimate and just family and Witnesses Then there is a combination of both! I want to marry you. I want a Catholic marriage.
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(Holy Shirtballs, he has done so much for me? Really... The annulment, becoming Catholic are not things that I asked for. I specifically told him not to get an annulment, it was not worth it. I love that he seriously thought that after breaking up with him in July, having charges laid throughout the fall, that her in November, I would just forget all of that, and immediately move in with him. Hey, he made an offer of paying off my mortgage, no questions asked, but never had money for coffee, groceries or anything else during our relationship. The only time he paid for things, it was because he was using points that he had saved, and that was only twice.)
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